September 2009
60 posts
3 tags
WANNA BE A DOUCHEBAG FOR HALLOWEEN?
I just could not believe my eyes when I saw this in Duane Reade this afternoon:
Really? REALLY? We’re making Halloween costumes out of THIS GUY?
Well, if starts getting close to Halloween, and you find yourself in desperate need of a costume, just throw on an Affliction t-shirt and this wig and you’re good to go. Maybe I’ll even dig out my Daisy costume from last year and...
3 tags
MICHAEL JACKSON WALKS AMONG US?
Is it just me? Or do some images of Michael Jackson (especially this weird cross stitch thing) kind of remind you of old school Glenn Danzig? I’m not sure if either party would appreciate such a comparison…
… but it’s just a thought.
-Elise
**UPDATE: I NEED THIS SHIRT!!! Thanks, Kristin!
4 tags
WUSSY WEDNESDAY - 9/30/09
This weekend I’ll be heading back to my alma mater (again) for homecoming. GO ORANGE :)
Therefore, this week for Wussy Wednesday I wanted to really delve into my college past- well, what I can remember of it. Ahhh, to be young and get away with binge drinking at noon on a Thursday…
For some reason, my roommate Jenny would often get her buzz on and blast Crossfade’s...
3 tags
HE'S GONNA BE PISSED WHEN HE SEES THIS
I just found this picture on TMZ. That’s one of the dudes from Tokio Hotel on the left, and Axl Rose circa 1980 on the right. Then again…who’s really the bigger douche these days, anyway?
If you don’t know who Tokio Hotel are, you’ll get what I mean when you click here.
-Elise
2 tags
YOU WANT IT, YOU GOT IT: PUSSY
Ok ok. So this new video from German rockers, Rammstein, sure does have everyone in a tizzy. I heard about it from the interwebs, but I didn’t really care to venture into it for my own because- I may be blonde, but I’m not stupid. The song/video is called “Pussy” and anywhere you go everyone is going bucknutty about how controversial it is. I...
2 tags
NOBODY'S PERFECT
My drunken bar conversations are quickly becoming the best inspiration for my posts. This weekend I presented the following question: “What was Mike Patton’s worst project?” I immediately broke out into a fit of laughter when my beered-up counterpart quickly responded with the same exact answer I had in mind: MALDOROR.
I honestly never even heard She until I was in...
2 tags
AWW LOOK AT THIS WITTLE GUY
It’s Yom Kippur. I’m not even supposed to be online right now, but I felt it absolutely necessary to share this new toy called Pandara, the Heavy Metal Panda, by Paul Shih. I’m not having kids anytime soon ever, so if any of you out there happen to get knocked up, I’ll be sure to have a few of these sent over.
Hmmm…sounds like another play on words challenge!...
4 tags
GET IT, TARA MCLEOD
In just a couple of hours, I’ll be seeing one of my old faves, Kittie at BB Kings in NYC. Before any show I attend, I make sure to overdose on all of that band’s music as a method of getting myself pumped. I was doing just that when I realized that current Kittie guitarist Tara McLeod has achieved the unthinkable: She is officially the second woman since Talena Atfield to be featured...
5 tags
BEARDS CAN MAKE A GIRL DO CRAZY THINGS
Sorry dudes out there, 1/2 of the RiB team is off the market. I found myself a beardo. Go figure. But to quote one of Elise’s and my favorite pasttime’s, “Relationships require compromise. Who’s? Yours or Theirs?”
My compromise? The very NOT brutal Keller Williams:
Yes, I’m serious. I’m gonna go see… that in a couple weeks. But it made me...
2 tags
"THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE" OF OTTAWA MIGHT HAVE SWINE...
I just got home from the gym where I watched my usual TMZ on TV, and they played this clip from Marilyn Manson’s show in Ottawa this past Sunday. Now, I definitely don’t condone people shooting their snot on others, but when it just so happens to be the night before you announce to the world that you have swine flu….that is just repulsive, disgusting, BLEHHHH. But you know...
5 tags
DO YOU NEED A RATIO TO GET IN?
I don’t know if I’m totally behind and out of the loop on this, but apparently there is something called a “Metal Frat” at the University of Michigan at Ann Arbor. Basically, it’s a big ass house that puts on shows all the time. It’s not so strange, considering I went to a college that was pretty big on basement shows….but I’ve never heard of...
3 tags
I WISH SIMONE SIMONS WOULD "UNLEASH" ON ME
If Simone Simons wanted to follow me around, like she’s following the guy in this video…I would definitely be okay with that. I am so gaga over that girl, it makes me wish I actually liked her band more. Oh well. The song is called “Unleashed” which is on Epica’s new album, Design Your Universe.
Red-headed women are very intimidating to me. I’m not...
4 tags
EVEN BABIES ARE BETTER THAN YOU, LARS
OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS. CUTE OVERLOAD.
The good news: I was forwarded the cutest video of a 4 year old kid playing metal songs on the drums today.
The bad news: “Embedding disabled by request” LAME
BUT I CAN STILL LINK IT. Take that, YouTube.
This little boy does it all: Ozzy, Priest, SOAD, AC/DC, Nickelback, Kiss- wait, Nickelback? Ok, maybe not everything is so good, but...
5 tags
SEBASTIAN BACH IZ A FATTY
Another washed up rocker is makin’ his way to reality TV fame. Color me stoked! I honestly can’t even remember the last time I saw Sebastian Bach, but he’s gotta be puttin’ ‘em on if he’s joining the cast of Celebrity Fit Club! Does anyone remember when he was on Celebrity Rap Superstar??
Why don’t they ask Dave Grohl to come on, too? He’s...
2 tags
I DO NOT WISH TO ESCAPE CONSENSUAL RELATIONS WITH...
Ever since last week, I keep heading on over to Lambgoat to listen to the new Horse the Band song, “Rape Escape.” I really really really really like it, but it actually seems a lot darker than most of the stuff they’ve done in the past. At first I thought…are HtB a serious band, now? This is nothing like their Pizza EP, and they definitely don’t have scissors on...
2 tags
RANDY BLYTHE WANTS TO FROLICK THROUGH A MEADOW OF...
I saw this video on MetalSucks yesterday, and I don’t know if anyone has ever mentioned this before, but it always seems like LoG’s singer is skippin’ to my loo all the livelong day. I know it must be hard to fill the space on a stage that massive, but I can’t help but giggle.
It’s like grade school gym class all over again when we’d have to travel to and...
3 tags
HANUKKAH CAME A LITTLE EARLY THIS YEAR
I am not a religious person by any means, so you can imagine my Jewish mother’s delight when I told her I attended something called Major League Dreidel last December. The event is one part dreidel tournament (based on how long your spin lasts), and another part metal. That’s right…Jew metal.
A few of my friends are in a band called the Gods of Fire, who are not only the...
2 tags
WUSSY WEDNESDAY - 9/23/09
Jon Secada’s “Just Another Day” is just so damn painful. Ugh. Ya feel that? …no? Well, you’re a heartless prick. I don’t care if anyone hates any of the music that I love, but to say something negative about this song? That shit’s just personal.
Truth be told…if Reign in Blonde craps out, I might just start another blog that will celebrate...
4 tags
I FOUND THE WHAAAALES
Well, I certainly had a pleasant evening last night…jam packed full of sweet breakdowns and kooky characters. Not to mention an injury. Oh hey, why don’t I whine some more? Here’s a brief rundown:
I don’t go to the Music Hall of Williamsburg very often, but I love it for one reason, and one reason only: AIR CONDITIONING. I’m always 20 degrees hotter than...
3 tags
ANOTHER REASON TO LIKE PIG DESTROYER
Seriously, dude? Metalheads don’t get swine flu. Man up!
-Julia
3 tags
DISNEY PRINCESSES ARE BRUTAL BITCHES
I know I know, where have I been? No, I didn’t fall off the edge of the earth (again), but I’m back and that’s what’s important. So quit your bitchin’. (Love you guyssssssssss)
ANYWAY, it looks like illustrator Jeffrey Thomas has drawn up a series of more brutalized Disney Princess characters, just for kicks. I myself have never understood the Disney and Disney...
2 tags
BE. VERY. AFRAID.
This is a warning for all of you. Another one of those Punk Goes… compilations is on the way. This time they’re doing classic rock songs. The full band/song list has yet to be released, but according to Absolute Punk, some dude who goes by the name nevershoutnever (spacebarsaresolameyouguyz) is taking on the beast that is “Bohemian Rhapsody.” I guess he at least...
2 tags
WHY NO MAN WILL EVER LOVE ME
-Elise
3 tags
JUGGALOS + MAGGOTS = 2GETHER 4EVAR
I just found this video featuring a Juggalo and a Maggot making a plea to their “people” to come together and end their feud. Videogum writes:
Because as someone on the outside of this Shakespearean feud it’s just like, stop! Stop! You’re all terrible!
At first I was pissed that the indie community was stealing our Juggalo-bashing fun, but then I realized that I...
2 tags
DAVE MUSTAINE = STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE
And speaking of Led Zeppelin…there’s this cutesy named dessert joint opening up soon here in New York called Led Zeppole. So since we love a good play on words here at Reign in Blonde, my twin brother Gary Suarez and I have collabo’d on a list of dessert-themed band names:
Satyricake
Sconeverge
Mastodonut
Melt-Banana Split
Muffinntroll
Mesh-sugar
Pie Destroyer
Harvey...
3 tags
I'M STARTING A BOYCOTT
I am so sick of looking at this same damn t-shirt everywhere I go. I have absolutely no problem with anyone liking Led Zeppelin, but jeez louise, FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO WEAR!
Like this.
-Elise
2 tags
THIS IS WHAT I CALL REGRETCORE
I don’t think I need to tell any of you how not metal the Dave Matthews Band are, but I found this video pretty funny, so I had to post it. [via BuzzFeed.]
I was a big on rock/alternative radio in pre/early teens, so I must admit that I dabbled in a bit of this “DMB” mumbo jumbo for a little while back then. Eventually things get weeded out. I’ve since recovered,...
2 tags
MY METAL WORKOUT
…yeah, that’s not me. Anyway, Metal Inquisition did a post today on Heavy Metal Jock Jamz. Pretty funny stuff, as usual. I, too, am a gym-goer. While I prefer watching TV when doing my cardio (TMZ ON TV, YESSSS), the ones at my ghetto ass gym are often broken, so I will sometimes just listen to music.
I must “regretfully” admit that I have no Brocore or...
2 tags
WUSSY WEDNESDAY - 9/16/09
First of all, this video is horrible, but it’s the only one I could find with the song I wanted. Eff you internet.
Regardless, this week’s Wussy Wednesday is a song from an album that helped shape my adolescence: “Daddy” from Jewel’s Pieces of You.
It IS called Wussy Wednesday, so prepare yourself for a little cheesiness right now. Pieces of You is an album...
2 tags
\M/ A X I P A D
The new Slayer artwork for World Painted Blood [courtesy of MetalSucks], indicates to me that the thrash gods appreciate their female listeners. What do you think?
-Elise
2 tags
SWAYZE WAS A LAMB OF GOD FAN?
…not quite.
Go to Youtube and type in “Patrick Swayze metal,” and this is the first thing that pops up. (I’m….cool?) At the 2:10 mark, Randy gives a shout out to the (now) late Patrick Swayze and devotes the song “Now You’ve Got Something to Die For” to him. I think this video was shot shortly after Swayze was diagnosed with cancer in early...
3 tags
THE BR00TAL TR00TH - KIM
[photo by Elizabeth Bruneau]
What could possibly be better than two blonde chicks writing a metal blog? Bringing a third one in to join in on the fun, of course. Ladies and gentlemen: the one, the only, ‘Grim’ Kim Kelly is in the building to weigh in on life overseas, her seldom-seen girly side, and her amazingly br00tal, yet tiresome schedule. Check her out at Terrorizer,...
4 tags
TAKE THAT, APOCALYPTICA!
TWO WORDS: HEADBANGING ORCHESTRA. It starts to get real good around the 2:45 mark. Hey guy in the middle, call me.
[via Cakehead Loves Evil.]
-Elise
3 tags
DEAR ZAKK WYLDE: DON'T DIE :(
See, people! This is why it’s important to give blood, metalheads need blood too! Get on it.
Anyway, Zakk Wylde has some kind of rare blood clotting disorder and has been in and out of the hospital as of late. I think it’s all the stress of his recent split with Ozzy. Breakin’ up is hard to do, but you’ve gotta take care of yourself Zakky-poo! Feel...
3 tags
THE VMA'S WERE METAL FOR ABOUT 0.2 SECONDS LAST...
Ok, I know everyone is sick of hearing about the VMAs. I think I’m more sick of hearing people bitch about people talking about the VMAs. (Does that make me post modern or something? ..no? OK..) I did a little livetweeting of it last night, because I was surprised to find that it was actually somewhat entertaining this year.
Jack Black and Gossip Girl’s Leighton Meester came...
3 tags
GRINDCORE MAKES MAINSTREAM NEWS!
….but not for any reason you’d ever expect.
I went to college at Rutgers, a school famous for their local basement show scene. One Winter, much to the delight of a couple friends and I, the mighty Child Abuse graced good ol’ New Brunswick with their rockness. It was Winter break at the time, so not many people showed up. Seriously, I don’t think there were more than...
4 tags
REIGN IN BLOOD. DOWN UNDER.
Oh, I’m sorry. Good morning, all. Luckily for you, this report isn’t as gross as the title eludes to. But I got you to wake up, didn’t I?
Slayer will be performing Reign in Blood from start to finish. AWESOME. Not so awesome? They’re doing it in AUSTRAILIA of all places. Dude, none of you are Austrailian, and we Americans (and blondes and non-blondes) love you. Do it...
7 tags
SWEET BABY JESUS. OR ROB HALFORD.
I’m not quite ready to get in the Xmas/Hanukkah spirit (helllooooo we haven’t even gotten to Halloween yet. Calm down people) but I seem to be the only one excited to hear about a forthcoming CHRISTMAS album from our favorite gay, Rob Halford. I’m also probably the only one in the metal community who enjoys the Twisted Sister AND the star-studded (get that pun? STUDDED? Ugh,...
3 tags
NEVER FORGET
For those of you in America and especially in New York, today is a sad day. I know that ever year it chokes me up for sure. But, be as it may, we Americans are resilient and thus, we can’t dwell on the bad, but look to the present and the future. SO TONIGHT, WE DINE, IN HELL! And by hell, I mean that we’ll be out and about metal-ing in up in NYC at some bars with the rest of the...
3 tags
....AND SPEAKING OF THRASHIN'
It turns out Scott Weiland has a new clothing line out with English Laundry. I suppose it abides by all of my previous suggestions, but I’m going to have to veto the pink pants. Did Scotty forget that we’re not all quite as pretty as him?
Don’t forget the $59 matching tie. [via Blabbermouth.]
-Elise
2 tags
THRASHIN' WEEK
Man, doesn’t it suck when you have to go to your job and uh…actually work? …thus preventing me from having much playtime with you dudes today. Oh well.
Anyway, it’s all kind of boring news in the metal world today, but here in New York, it’s Fashion Week. I’m no big huge fashionista, but I certainly don’t wear ugly stuff. Unfortunately, most of you...
2 tags
DEAD BY APRIL WISH YOU WERE HERE
Why even bother with the muted ‘dark and sinister’ color level when we can clearly see that beautiful oasis right behind you? Are you guys staying at the Mohonk Mountain House? BR00TAL.
Be sure to send me a postcard. Or was this it?
-Elise
4 tags
THEY'RE BAAAAAAACK
Remember our favorite femme metal tribute band?? They finally found new members! Soon enough, they’ll be rockin’ a Jersey bar near you. They have some new demos up on their MySpace which sound about as good as those karaoke booths at Six Flags. Is it just me, or is that chick always a beat or two behind? Not that it matters. Also, the NO’s on that Epica cover are dipped...
2 tags
WUSSY WEDNESDAY - 09/09/09
It seems only appropriate to give a nod to The Beatles today. “Lady Madonna” has always been one of my favorite songs by them….and it just so happens to not be included on the game. Bastards.
Whatever, I suck at Rock Band.
-Elise
4 tags
9/9/09
Happy upside-down evil day, you weirdos. Now go get a life.
<3 RiB
2 tags
COME TOGETHER
The morning commute after a long weekend is always a little rough on me. I dozed off with my iPod on shuffle and on came a song by Electric Six, a non-metal band that I absolutely adore.
I remember going to a few shows of theirs and seeing an oddly mixed crowd. About half were indie dance rock kids, and the other half were my familiar nerdy metal crowd <3. Electric Six have so flawlessly...
3 tags
ME. OW.
Well, hot diggity damn. I interrupt your Labor Day laziness to bring you a chick metal update. Kittie’s new album is on the horizon, and after listening to the single, I think they might have just made quite the ferocious return.
Now, I’ve always been a Kittie fan in good and in bad. Yes, we know, they’ve been through 1348736 lineup changes and some albums have been better...
2 tags
ENSIFERUM CANNOT BE BOTHERED
me: Oh hey guys, whatcha doin’?
Band: Shooting a video.
me: But, you’re just standing here……?
Band: Yup.
me: …..
-Elise
3 tags
IT'S THE MOST. WONDERFUL TIME. OF THE YEAR.
Well, here we are, folks. Laboy Day weekend is finally upon us, marking the ‘unofficial’ end of Summer. GOOD RIDDANCE YOU WRETCHED, WRETCHED SEASON. I will not even for a moment miss the excessive sweaty-ness or all the bugs chewing up my legs, because FALL F’ING RULES. The leaves turn lots of pretty colors (because they’re dying \m/), I can bust out my scarves and my...
2 tags
JUST DANCE
I’m not one of those lucky shmucks with a cool “music industry” job where I get to kiss shitty bands’ asses all day long. I work in some other bullshit field where I pretend peoples’ “Damn it’s Monday” and “Finally it’s Friday” jokes are amusing.
Two of my co-workers are somewhat fascinated with me. They always catch me watching...