CHECK OUT MY FAV TWEEN JAMZ 2K10 ON STUFFYOUWILLHATE.COM!

Yup, I’m causing more tween mayhem on your favorite blog, Stuff You Will Hate. Check out what tween hits I was digging this year, and be sure to share yours!

Click here to see my list.

-Elise

ELISE’S BEST OF 2010

Don’t ice me, fool.

Why am I writing this? You’ve already scrolled down to my #1, didn’t see The Ocean or any Profound Snore bands, rolled your eyes and x’d out the window. Well gee golly, I gotta fill this space with something. So uhh, yeah….2010, what a hoot. A lot was gained in terms of love, friendships, and new interests, but an increased appreciation for metal? Not so much. The more I explored what’s currently out there (and especially after getting to see Faith No More over the Summer), the more I realized how incredibly non-crucial everything is. I’m 25 years old now. Is anything nowadays really going to measure up to my already established favorite bands? No way in hell. As much as I hate to sound like an old fart, it’s true. But don’t let my old lady attitude get you down. If you’re still young and wet behind the ears, I hope you enjoy what music’s still coming your way. That said…there had to be a few albums this year that didn’t make me feel like such a grump, right? Right. Well, I’m proud to present them to you today. (As awful as you probably think they are.) Here’s what 2010 sounded like to you good ol’ friend Elise:

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JULIA’S BEST OF 2010

It’s cliched, I know, but this year really did go by quick. Let’s see, last year at this time I was freshly back home with my parents (if I remember correctly, I finished my end of the year list the very night that I packed up out of Brooklyn and came home), and trying to decide my next move. I know that I promised a lot more writing this year, and that I kinda failed on an epic scale, but life happens. This year I moved back to Syracuse, got more serious with The Beardo (yeah, he’s still around), got a legit big girl job, and did a decent amount of travel in the US of A. It wasn’t the best year ever, but it wasn’t the worst. I know there’s better shit to come in 2011 and after, I just don’t know exactly what it’ll be. But enough about my personal life, that’s not what you’re here for.

As far as metal goes, I am proud that I challenged myself this year. I purposely listened to a lot of shit that I wouldn’t normally pick out, and surprised myself even more when I liked it. And on another note, it almost had to be a challenging year to pick out a top 10, as NONE of my favorite, go to bands had a new release this year. In all honesty, my top 10 were really difficult to sift through- the lower 5 and upper five weren’t too hard to chose, but within those brackets it was really difficult for me to pick an order. 5 through 1 especially could’ve been switched around in anyway depending on my mood that day. But, I know that you’re all going to agree, disagree, and interpret your own top 10 however you choose anyway, so get to it. All the best to our readers, you guys rule. ONTO 2011!!

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ANGELA GOSSOWSKI’S TOP HOWEVER MANY ALBUMS I HAD TIME TO WRITE ABOUT THIS YEAR

Oh hai, 2011. You crept up fast. This year was…interesting. Metalwise, there were some great albums, but honestly, not enough for me to make a full top 10. Listen, I can hear you bitching right now. Stop it. Shut-up. Why do I only have 7 albums? Well it’s not because I don’t believe there were 10 great albums this year, it’s the fact that I just didn’t get to listen to every fucking thing that was released. I don’t got that kinda time. Do you want me to make shit up and pretend I listened to something to complete the list? That would be shitty of you. You must be a lying sack of shit. You get a lump of coal and a wicked case of Syphilis courtesy of Saint Nick himself. Anyway, here is my list, in no particular order (but there probably is so just take a guess I suppose).

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CHRISTMAS ORNAMENTS ARE METAL… OR PLASTIC

Found this little gem around the interwebs just now and I must have it. Reminds me that I need to start collecting some ornaments so I can make my own little mish-moshed metal Xmas tree someday. I don’t think I’d mind putting these on my tree either:

How do you put the metal into YOUR holiday cheer?

-Julia

MORE HOLIDAY GIFTS FOR THE MUSIC LOVER IN YOUR LIFE

I must say, I gave Mr. Suarez’s holiday gift guide an uproarious applause yesterday. But lately I’ve been obsessed with this website UncommonGoods.com, and they definitely have a few good music-related gift options, including these guitar string bracelets ($10) pictured above. I would wear these myself, but I don’t play guitar, so it seems kind of dumb. But if another ladypal you know does, maybe you can get here one or two of these.

Check out UncommonGoods’ other gifts for music lovers. They have pretty quick shipping, so hop on it!

-Elise

PANTY RAID! MR DECEMBER IS… GARY SUAREZ OF METALSUCKS.NET!

Ahhh, Christmas: that magical time of year when we celebrate the birth of Jesus by arguing over whether or not Wal-Mart greeters should be allowed to say Happy Holidays. Now if, like me, you’ve got metalheads in your family—filthy, vile creatures—and you want to make sure you do right by them this Yule-tide season. So here am I—America’s greatest living music journalist—with a Holiday Gift Guide for the headbangers you’ve got to buy something for since they’re obligated to get you something.

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A LIT BIT OF PRE-CHRISTMAS NAUGHTY AND NICE: METAL EDITION

For the most part, us metaloids are a fan of the naughty. But naughty in a good way. Naughty fun, like boozin it up, goin’ CAHRAAAAZAAAYYY at shows, and being a part of all things dark and brooding. But it’s nice to know that most of us have a nice side too. Exhibits A and B below:

THE NAUGHTY

Motorhead fan Andrew Crawford was beaten to death outside of said band’s show in Leeds, England this week. Crawford and his cousin got into it with two other fans after the show (over a “hair burning” incident that occured earlier in the evening) and though his cousin wasn’t not seriously injured, Crawford was rushed to a nearby hospital with head injuries that later caused his death that same night. NOT OK. Live shows are supposed to be fun, and they’re certainly not supposed to end like this. Tone it down, people.

THE NICE

In This Moment, Bleeding Through and others will be playing a benefit show in California on 12/18 called “Noyz for Toyz” to benefit Toys for Tots. In case you can’t figure out what the charity does by the what it’s called, the concert will be an official drop off point for people to bring new toys for local kids in need for the holiday season. Toys for Tots is a fantastic charity that has been around for years, and whether or not you like the bands involved, it’s great to see metal bands reaching out to needy kids. (Like the idea? For those of you not in California, you can find a Toys for Tots drop off center in your town HERE)

-Julia

BRIAN POSEHN LIVES THE ‘SUITE LIFE’

Years ago, I thought Brian Posehn’s standup was pretty funny. But then he became the “metal comedian,” inked a deal with Relapse, and writes dumdum hits like “More Metal Than You.” So nowadays…..I can’t be bothered.

But last night on Disney Channel’s The Suite Life on Deck, Posehn proved he wasn’t too “metal” to give tweens a laugh. Posehn played a famous scientist whom the Sprouse twins visit in Antarctica. His role isn’t all that funny or anything, but I’d bet anything he only did this to earn a few bucks, since ya know…there’s only so much money to be made as the “metal comedian.” Fast forward to the 3:20 mark to see his “suite” work.

Appearing on the Disney Channel = huge redeeming quality in my book. Get on it, Mustaine.

-Elise

BLACK METAL CROCHET; SASHAY

I’m waiting for my pumpkin cheesecake to get out of the oven and I found this cute wittle guy over at good ol’ BuzzFeed. Maybe you could all try making one of these this weekend while you’re ignoring your dad yell out dramatically incorrect Jeopardy answers. And then you could give it to Abbath when he comes back to the US this Winter. I’m sure he’ll love it.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

-Elise