GRINDCORE MAKES MAINSTREAM NEWS!

….but not for any reason you’d ever expect.

I went to college at Rutgers, a school famous for their local basement show scene.  One Winter, much to the delight of a couple friends and I, the mighty Child Abuse graced good ol’ New Brunswick with their rockness.  It was Winter break at the time, so not many people showed up.  Seriously, I don’t think there were more than 15-20 people there, if that.  But the band still rocked it, and we even got to talk to the singer and drummer for a few minutes.  Nice dudes.

Little did I know that I was in the company of literary “royalty.” According to the New York Post, drummer Oran Canfield is the son of Jack Canfield, the man behind the Chicken Soup book series.  Hold for laughter…..didn’t see that one coming.  Who’d have thunk that a man who has built his career around being uplifting and positive would spawn the drummer of a kooky band with song titles like “Penal Jihad.”  Not to mention that their name is Child Abuse.

But as it turns out, Jack Canfield was no family man, but rather a douche who abandoned his wife!  Suddenly it all makes sense.  Oran’s tell-all, called Long Past Stopping, will be in stores tomorrow.

So weird, right?  This guy could totally get into Oprah’s Book Club with a story like that!  ( \m/ ?? )

[via Gawker.]

-Elise