STRAIGHT OUTTA DETWAT: ANGELA HAS A NOT-SO-QUICKIE WITH KRYSTA CAMERON OF IWRESTLEDABEARONCE

Yeah, I know, the photo is old. Spare me.

Warped Tour has come and gone. Personally, I could care less. There were about 4-5 bands out of 60 that appealed to me. Congratulations to those few bands. While I was there (and not in the bathroom shitting every 5 minutes) I had the pleasure of meeting a fantastic band. Their name is IWRESTLEDABEARONCE, have you guys heard of them? Well Krysta, Kristen, Christine, whatever her name was at the time of our interview, was kind enough to sit down with me in the scorching heat and talk all things Kevin Bacon, Korn (srsly) and her band’s plans for the rest of 2010. Just an FYI: she fucking rules.

Why Kevin Bacon and not like, Burt Bacharach or something?

Or like, you know, Steven Segal or somebody! I dunno […] all of our song titles are inside jokes between the band, but for that one specific song we actually asked a fan and said, hey, somebody’s gotta name this song. So we did the contest on who you should name the song after, and he [the winner] said, “Tastes Like Kevin Bacon”. And I was like, GENIUS.

And that’s the song that ends up blowing up and making you guys who you are!

Well we were kind of a little skeptical about using it because we’re using Kevin Bacon’s actual name, but we actually have some friends in South Carolina, Rob and Bam, who work at a metal radio station and they’ve been supporting us since we were like, nothing, and playing that song. So they actually had the Bacon brothers come in, because they were doing a show in South Carolina, and said to them, “Hey, we have this band, they are friends of ours, we play them all the time, and they have a song called ‘Tastes Like Kevin Bacon’.” Then Kevin Bacon himself goes, “I know that band! I love that band. I think it’s genius, their band name is genius.” So he’s not even mad. I heard the interview and everything and was like, AWESOME!

Did he ever try to contact you guys at all?

No, but we did kind of blow off his son.

On accident?! [laughter]

Yeah! Because some kid came up to us in California and was like, “I’m Kevin Bacon’s son.” And we’re like, “ohhhhh yeah okay, whatever”! And then after we heard that interview, Kevin Bacon was like, “Oh my son likes that band”. So…HILARIOUS! Ooops. I love Kevin Bacon! I mean, he’s always showing his thermal penis, like in Hollow Man, and he’s in the Calvin Klein ads.

He’s just so eager to show off his dong, it just ain’t no thang anymore.

Exactly! He has awesome dance moves in freaking Footloose.

Have you ever played the game though, 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon?

No…?

It’s an actual board game. I don’t know if they even make it anymore. I’m surprised that no one has bought that for you yet.

Wow! Maybe we can find it on eBay.

Oh you know you can find it on eBay.

But some of the pieces might be missing…

Eh, true. Speaking of things missing, you gotta fill in this blank for me: 9 out of 10 times IWRESTLEDABEARONCE fans ____________.

Touch each other inappropriately, but we don’t think it’s inappropriate, we think it’s very sexual.

Back in March when you guys were on tour with Dillinger, you had said on stage, “I haven’t showered in days and my vagina smells like shit.” How’s everyone’s genatilia doing so far on this tour?

Yes. Well, it’s Summer so it makes things a little bit spicier.

A little more fragrant.

Oh yeah. I really think that any girl that’s on tour, because you don’t get to shower that often, there is this lovely little thing called Summer’s Eve. It’s a vagina spray, you just spray it on your vagina after you’re done. They also have the wash and the Wet Ones, the wipes. So you’re constantly rockin’ [as much feminine hygiene product as possible]. Let’s see, I’ve showered…twice so far on this tour, which has lasted about a week. But it is Summer time, so I’ve been trying to get some more showers in, ya know? So if it wasn’t for those wipes and that spray, I’d be a dirty girl. But I don’t have anybody to impress. My boyfriend isn’t here, he won’t be visiting until the 2nd, so I’m hoping to get a shower in so he’s not like, “Baby you smell like a vagina. You smell like yeast.” Oh, and drink a lot of cranberry juice because at least your getting it all out.

Drink any pineapple juice at all? It’s supposed to make things down there taste and smell better. I don’t know if that’s true or not or that would work while you’re on tour at all.

Rock and roll.

The full-length album is called It’s All Happening. What hasn’t happened that you’d like to see for IWRESTLEDABEARONCE?

To tour with Korn. Deftones, or Slipknot too, yeah.

Deftones I can understand. So…you guys, are like, a…a fan of Korn?

Oh yeah!

No shame?

No shame! We actually went to their studio because we recorded at Ross Robinson’s house who’s done you know, Slipknot, Deftones, Korn, Vanilla Ice, to name a few. He invited us over to Korn’s studio where we met Munky and the new drummer - I’m not familiar with his name – but they were sweet guys, gave us some of their Monsters so we could drive back to Louisiana from California.

How kind of them to give you some of their free endorsement product; Monster.

Yeah, and apparently Jonathan Davis – JD – there were rumors that he wanted to be on our “Taste Like Kevin Bacon” song but I didn’t know where to put him. I was like, alright, it’s JD, ya know? He’s got a wicked voice. Where to fit him in…I still love him, JD.

Soooooooooo…what do you think of the new Korn album [the sarcasm in my voice is thicker then syrup]

Actually, we got to listen to a few of the new tracks early on, when there was no vocals at that point, but the music reminded me of old Korn. And I think they’re getting a little bit more experimental. Which is cool, it’s very ambient. Like, Munky’s recordings were very ambient. And they’re recording with Ross. He’s a damn genius and just an awesome, down to earth dude. If you’re having a terrible day, Ross just goes, “You’re not having a bad day.”

Kind of like a Jedi mind trick. So overall you like Korn then?

Yes, yes we love Korn.

What do you think about most chicks in bands that are consistently keyboard players? Do you think that the keyboard thing is a little bit overdone these days?

Yes and no. Because you can say that about chick bassists and singers. I just think that there needs to be more girls in music and metal.

Regardless of what they’re doing, just putting out more of a female flare?

See I’m a big Tori Amos fan, so I see a chick on a piano and I’m like OH! That’s my girl.

But there is a difference between Tori Amos and Kristen Randall.

Well…Kristen has always been a nice girl to me, so I can’t really say anything.

I have a question from a fan that asks: Will you guys ever write a traditionally coherent song?

Like verse, chorus, verse? Sure, why not. Simplicity is good, and a lot of people don’t think that simplicity might be good. People might think, “Oh, IWRESTLEDABEARONCE, they’re not simple. They’re just all over the place.” We are, but just because a part is simple like verse/chorus/verse doesn’t mean it’s a bad song. So hell yeah maybe we will.

What are you plans after Warped looking like thus far?

Taking a break for about a month, then we do a headlining tour, then we’re going to be recording a new record!

Any new material written yet?

Some stuff, yeah. Hopefully we have a new song to show everybody when we go out as a headliner. We’re getting sick of these songs, this setlist.

Do you think you might do another contest like the one that named “Tastes Like Kevin Bacon?”

Maybe. We just did that so we could get people involved. If it wasn’t for those people, those fans, we wouldn’t be a band. We wouldn’t be here.

You have really involved and dedicated fans.

And that’s good because we like to be involved with them. There are a lot of bands that are too good, that are too cool for school to hang out with their fans and we like to hang out. Those are the people that make you and those are the people that will break you.

How did the remix CD do?

It did really well actually. A bunch of our friends remixed the songs; David Isen from HORSE The Band did a remix, Ben Weinman of The Dillinger Escape Plan did one, Jimmy Urine from Mindless Self Indulgence did a remix as well. Also on the CD we included the stems for our songs. So we’re going to be doing a contest soon where a fan can make he or she’s own remix. And we are going to pick the winner, which we think is the most rad.

Anything you’d like to say to Reign In Blonde fans?

Who?

That’s the website you’re talking to right now. My bad. [laughter]

Hell, start a band, go on tour. Even if you don’t want to start a band go out there and do something that you love doing. If you want something so bad, it can happen. Hell yeah!


—Also, check out the video my buddy Jeff took during IWABO’s set: an ultra wall of death. How he managed to hold his camera up during the stampede is beyond me. Golf claps for Jeff.



-A.Gossowski